The Petey Predicament

[Tciso]

You could write a song.

An epic tragedy in the style of Gordon Lightfoot?

[donlever]

More like Toby Keith.

To the tune of "I Love This Bar" by Toby Keith - Special writing cred to Donny for a couple tweaks

We got Cornuck, we got Lever
Chef, Blobcat, and Reefer
And we got Horseman, and Nukertuzzi
BoS and Bersnoozi
And we can always count on Rats to call the score (4-3 Canucks of course)
Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, I love this board

We got Saint, and MCP
Dangler, RG, and Cookie
And we got Cuz, the twin harpooner
Megs and Carl, th’ old schooners
And there’s Mëds, Theman, and sometimes DBR
Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, I love this board

I love this board
It’s my kind of place
Just walk in through the front door
You’ll find the finest rePERbates
It’s ain’t too far
Come as you are
Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, I love this board

We’ve seen Expats, we’ve got Lancer
We’ve seen Widow’s would-be romancers
And we got Tciso, we got Topper
We’ve even seen a Jello-Puddin-Popper
And we come to Cherry our team in one accord
Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, I love this board

(Now) We’ve lost our share, to the Reaper
Here’s to, Eddie, SKYO, and Creeper
Let’s raise a tall one, to old Rumsfeld
And salute to Doc Strangelove
Their names forever on this forum here record
Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, I love this board

I like our team
I like this city (most of it anyways)
I like to get a breath of fresh air
I like the real world now and then
But I love this board
It’s my kind of place
There’s nothing like a forum
Packed full of reprobates
No cover charge (but donate please)
Come as you are
Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, I love this board

[Carl Yagro]

An epic tragedy in the style of Gordon Lightfoot?

The obvious remake would be The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.

Maybe another appropriate one would be Warren Zevon's Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner. Always loved the story telling in that song.

[donlever]

The site it lives on from Cornuck on down
For the failure they call Canucks Hockey
The Frank, it is said, never gives up though dead
When the skies of the season turn gloomy
With a lame looking core, 11 point 6 millions more
Than 55 sad seasons weighed empty
That good CC crew had many bones could be chewed
When team failures again showed up early