Dear US Border Guards...

The primary goal of this site is to provide mature, meaningful discussion about the Vancouver Canucks. However, we all need a break some time so this forum is basically for anything off-topic, off the wall, or to just get something off your chest! This forum is named after poster Creeper, who passed away in July of 2011 and was a long time member of the Canucks message board community.

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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Per » Thu May 31, 2012 11:50 am

Still. It's so much nicer without border control. I just love Schengen.
You should do something similar within the Nafta framework.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schengen_Agreement
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Strangelove » Thu May 31, 2012 2:08 pm

Topper wrote:Doc, one of the most important things when admitting someone into a country on a temporary visit, is ensuring that they are going leave. You single sweet little foreign things with a sugar daddy in the US may just want to stay.

Not saying that is her situation but look at the border guards situation. Sweet young thing pulls up, Where do you live? Abbotsford, What is the purpose of your trip? I'm going to spend the weekend with my boyfriend. Is he Canadian working in the US? No sir, he's American. Ma'am, please park your car over there and come inside, I would like to ask you a few more questions.

At that point, she needs to prove that she has strong enough ties to Canada that she more likely to return to Canada than move in with her boyfriend.


I dunno Toppy, those dumfucks have 11 million illegal beaners running around loose

... maybe they should focus more on THAT. :twisted:

Canada is a better country than America.

If a passport-toting Canadian citizen wants to visit and/or perma-move to America

.... those "guards" at the border should kiss his or her sweet ass!

Especially MY sweet ass.

I live a coupla miles from a border crossing, could save lotsa bucks shopping down there, WON'T do it!

WHY??

Because I don't like the attitudes of those uppity little shitheads in their little booths with their little IQs.

Look at me, I've got a great attitude, why can't they be more like ME??!! :evil:
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Topper » Thu May 31, 2012 4:47 pm

Once in, deportation is a legal nightmare that can go on for years, it is better to not let them in to begin with.
Over the Internet, you can pretend to be anyone or anything.

I'm amazed that so many people choose to be complete twats.
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Strangelove » Thu May 31, 2012 5:25 pm

Tops, you were right about her needing to prove she has strong ties to Canada. She's working with a lawyer on that. Thing is they've got a cruise booked out of LA in one week. Hopefully they can get this straightened out by then. She lives out your way btw. I met the boyfriend (an electrician). He's fairly intelligent and educated. Well of course not educated on CANADA at all though lol. Typical American! He thought we are still a colony of Great Britain, etc.

But he's a fine young Republican and that's the main thing amirite? :mex:
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby ukcanuck » Thu May 31, 2012 9:00 pm

Strangelove wrote:Tops, you were right about her needing to prove she has strong ties to Canada. She's working with a lawyer on that. Thing is they've got a cruise booked out of LA in one week. Hopefully they can get this straightened out by then. She lives out your way btw. I met the boyfriend (an electrician). He's fairly intelligent and educated. Well of course not educated on CANADA at all though lol. Typical American! He thought we are still a colony of Great Britain, etc.

But he's a fine young Republican and that's the main thing amirite? :mex:


Is it me or does it seem totally strange that anyone would choose the US over Canada?, I mean Canadian immigration should be more concerned that the boyfriend will want to marry the girl as a way of claiming asylum in an actual civilized country...
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby LotusBlossom » Fri Jun 01, 2012 12:01 am

donlever wrote:...
When we went to the Ravens game last year the border guard was a 350 lb. sack of shit who was grilling the hell out of us, my buddy in the front seat was fucking around with his phone while I was talking to the guy...wtf r u doing with your phone sir?, says the guy, chill dude, sheesh, until, after taking note of his particularily rotund frame, I asked him kindly what one would eat at Qwest field, cue eyes lighting up, Oh, you gotta have the garlic fries, they're the best, garlic fries sir, ok says I, we'll have some fries, great, enjoy the game guys he says...and off we go.


I guess a way to a border guard's heart is through his stomach, or at least that one in particular.

I get gears when we go across the border and I flash an American passport and my family flashes Canadian ones...so I stopped doing that and just flash the Canadian ones. I'm so used to using my US passport for work trips, I forgot how much grief we get when I use it for a leisure trip. I guess they feel I am going bring my Canadian family into a country with higher unemployment and no universal health benefits. :eh:
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Vpete » Fri Jun 01, 2012 7:26 am

My uncle ( a yank) used to be in charge of Peace Arch, Douglas, Sumas and three other 'ports of entry' for the US Border. Best job ever I think.

Look at me funny: 'get out of the car sir'
Oh you say you have tickets for the game, can I see them? Oh will call... let's go find your credit card receipt.

you have no rights when you enter that country, imagine the power trip for a law enforcement officer with that privilege? The stories he would tell me about idiots coming down.

I used to go down all the time, had the old dead sticker covered VW van and once got pulled into Douglas crossing. So the guy goes and tells me where to park and then I go into the office. Young buck at the booth... I wasn't some rank hippie and all back then, I had a good haircut, clean t-shirt, shaved and real shoes.

So I'm sitting there waiting while these guys are looking at me and I'm checking my watch- gotta get to Sea-Tac for my flight to San Fran. So I get called up to the counter and the 'real' interrogation begins. I'm beginning to not like how this is all going but I know these young guys never like some pseudo hippie to get all macho on them so I sit and take it for a bit.

I know where this is going...the van. I've got an two hours until I have to be at the airport and this is going to mess things up big time. So I let the young'n keep going at me with his questions and politely answer them until 'Pete, what the hell are you doing in here?' 'Oh hi Larry, good to see you just answering some questions for the officer here'.

Larry looks down at the young'n and says 'This is Ken's nephew, get him the hell out of here and mark his plate # down for the future'.

Young'n looks at me 'Appears you can go sir, have a good day'

'Thanks,nice to see you Larry, and thanks'.

Nepotism, it's everywhere.
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Cornuck » Fri Jun 01, 2012 11:34 am

You must have had a very lucrative drug smuggling career. :D
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Strangelove » Fri Jun 01, 2012 12:22 pm

ukcanuck wrote:Is it me or does it seem totally strange that anyone would choose the US over Canada?, I mean Canadian immigration should be more concerned that the boyfriend will want to marry the girl as a way of claiming asylum in an actual civilized country...


Exactly my point, it's all assbackwards! :evil:

Dear Earthlings, if you have a choice of which Country to live in, choose Canada.

Anything else would be uncivilized. :mex:
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Strangelove » Fri Jun 01, 2012 12:28 pm

Vpete wrote:you have no rights when you enter that country, imagine the power trip for a law enforcement officer with that privilege?


Yup they are power-tripping you-know-wots!

I've never had a problem myself, but I have heard MANY over the years.

Whilst talking to her Yank boyfriend the other day I went into my usual border-guard rant.

Later he told me 3 of his relatives are US border-guards.

Me: "Well I'm sure there are some fine US border-guards." :look:
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby ukcanuck » Fri Jun 01, 2012 10:22 pm

Once upon a million years ago I found myself in queue waiting to pass through the border between San Diego and Tijuana. I was in the Canadian navy on shore leave and a group of us went in search of the legendary dancing girl and donkey show across the line. We never found that particular show, there were plenty of dancing girls and donkeys but alas, not on the same stage at the same time...Anyway on the way back on foot we found ourselves amongst a long line of Mexicans waiting to go through customs. I settled in for a long wait, however, the border guard pulled us whiteys out of the line and took to the front where they let us through hardly bothering to even look up from our ID to see that we matched our pictures. I remember feeling the glare of resentment drilling into our backs from the poor buggers waiting in line and being mildly disgusted with the whole scene, there was no way the guards knew who we were other than we looked white bread American....

I guess its not as blatantly racist on the north border at least...
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Hoss » Thu Jun 07, 2012 6:09 pm

Oh my god. A thread after my own heart. I've had some pretty nasty encounters coming back home from B.C. . .
Let's just say Customs doesn't hire the best and brightest. Its a great job if you want to lord over people.

Going to Canada has usually been easy. Although I did have my car searched once, while heading up to play a show at the Brickyard. Hadn't mentioned that. "What are all these guitars and amp heads in your trunk?" Still let me go, fun show too.

Coming back from a game in 2002 when the 'nucks got shutout by the Coilers I didn't have my passport. That was the crowning glory. Customs dick gave us hell (I hadn't been up since before 9/11 when shit was way more chill) and I started to lose it. Thankfully my g/f at the time calmed me down, but I wanted to lay into the fucker.

And about the nepotism - its true. One of my buddies from Blaine's mother worked at the border. He spent a couple of summers inspecting produce or some such thing. Working for the enemy but all in the family.
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Per » Fri Jun 08, 2012 1:43 am

Strangelove wrote:
ukcanuck wrote:Is it me or does it seem totally strange that anyone would choose the US over Canada?, I mean Canadian immigration should be more concerned that the boyfriend will want to marry the girl as a way of claiming asylum in an actual civilized country...


Exactly my point, it's all assbackwards! :evil:

Dear Earthlings, if you have a choice of which Country to live in, choose Canada.

Anything else would be uncivilized. :mex:


Canada is obviously an excellent choice, but Scandinavia is pretty decent too.
And I'd definitely consider a summer house on the outskirts of Barcelona. :mex:

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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby Strangelove » Fri Jun 08, 2012 1:55 pm

Hoss wrote:Oh my god. A thread after my own heart. I've had some pretty nasty encounters coming back home from B.C. . .
Let's just say Customs doesn't hire the best and brightest. Its a great job if you want to lord over people.

Going to Canada has usually been easy. Although I did have my car searched once, while heading up to play a show at the Brickyard. Hadn't mentioned that. "What are all these guitars and amp heads in your trunk?" Still let me go, fun show too.

Coming back from a game in 2002 when the 'nucks got shutout by the Coilers I didn't have my passport. That was the crowning glory. Customs dick gave us hell (I hadn't been up since before 9/11 when shit was way more chill) and I started to lose it. Thankfully my g/f at the time calmed me down, but I wanted to lay into the fucker.

And about the nepotism - its true. One of my buddies from Blaine's mother worked at the border. He spent a couple of summers inspecting produce or some such thing. Working for the enemy but all in the family.


LOL not sure how you made it across without your passport.

Things have definitely tightened up of late. *shoots dirty look at Mondi*

As a 16-year-old back in the day I used to cross the line a few times each summer with an ounce of weed hermetically-sealed in my windshield-washer container. And of course I was one extremely mouthy punk indeed. I remember one time the American guards had me get out and brought a dope-dog right through the front seat of my car. I distictly remember launching into a profanity-laced diatribe about wasting my time and paw-prints on the seat. I used the term "stupid fucking yanks" a few times.

That ounce of pot just under the hood all the while. :D

Not sure how I got away with that one either.
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Re: Dear US Border Guards...

Postby rats19 » Fri Jun 08, 2012 3:32 pm

Went across with my older brother In 1980..doing a trade show at the tacomadome. Anyhow the guard ordered trunck open which we did. Suitcase open then the guard started shiftin stuff around in suitcase....then he said ok boys off you go...

Brother says what a fuckhead....I says, fuckhead had my socks in his hand and In my socks was 1/4oz of pot...
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